"I must get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini."
Alexander Woollcott

"Martinis are like breasts, one isn't enough, and three is too many"
-San Francisco Chronicle columnist,
Herb Caen

"There is something about a Martini, a tingle remarkably pleasant; A yellow, mellow Martini; I wish that I had one at present. There is something about a Martini, Ere the dining and dancing begin, And to tell you the truth, It is not the vermouth- I think that perhaps it's the gin.
Ogden Nash


You have a friend in the BestMan business!

"You can no more keep a martini in the refrigerator than you can keep a kiss there. The proper union of gin and vermouth is a great and sudden glory; it is one of the happiest marriages on earth and one of the shortest-lived." - Bernard De Voto (1897 - 1955) OK! OK! So, it's an emergency! Here, just do this and everything will be fine.
Emergency recipe:
Dry Martini straight up
1. gin and ice in shaker
2. glass, olive on toothpick, add vermouth (use eyedropper)
3. Pour gin through strainer into glass.

It's a hazy shade of winter
How do you make a martini that stands up to the light of day?

We're glad you asked. First, we prefer a shaken Martini. James Bond requires his martini "shaken, not stirred", and if it's good enough for Bond it's good enough for us.

We also like Latin Jazz, and shaking a martini to Cal Tjader is like a half hour workout with some bunz-o-steel chick. Also, we like the way shaking pounds the ice into little snowflakes, so that when the Martini is poured into a glass, it's like a little winter storm blowing in form the north, about to leave you and your guests snowed in for the night.

Nothing beats the way the frost advances like the Russian Army up the side of the icy shaker.

Remember, the best Martini is cold - it approaches absolute zero. "Lukewarm Martini," is an oxymoron, like Military Intelligence, or Jumbo Shrimp, it's no fun to drink. Store all of your ingredients, save the olives, in the freezer - the alcohol content lowers the freezing point, so none of it will ice up on you. In fact, why not have the whole party in a huge walk-in freezer. It will keep the Martinis cold and when the stripper arrives you'll have a couple of places where you can hang your coat.

  The Big Day
Steppin' Out
Game On

But gosh guys, how do you make a
real Martini?